In some regards, my high school daughter is the Anti-Teenager. She avoids trends (especially in social media) and is comfortable doing her own thing. I canât say too much about her non-teenager habits, because sheâd get mad at me for sharing. Iâve already said too much. In that regard, she is very much a teenager.
Enter The Best Friend. She is my daughterâs oldest friend and like another daughter to me. They say, âWeâve known each other since before we were born.â Itâs true. We moms were pregnant together, and the girls are only three weeks apart. They did many things together: kiddie gym classes, preschool, dance, sleepovers, playdates, trips to DisneyWorld,and anything else we could come up with. They are very much like sisters.
The Daughter and The Best Friend couldnât be more different.
Totes
The Best Friend keeps me abreast of the goings on in the world of teenagers. Sheâs my friend on Facebook. She tells me about stuff that I would never hear from The Daughter. She also speaks as if sheâs textingâshortened words and acronyms.
âOMG, thatâs totes awes.â
What? When did a tote bag get involved?
The Daughter translates for me (she doesnât speak The Best Friendâs language, but she understands it). It means, âOh my gosh, that is totally awesome.â
âTotesâ is short for âtotally.â Itâs one of The Best Friendâs favorite words. It also doubles as âYes, I wholeheartedly agree with you.â
Selfies
The Best Friend loves Instagram. We havenât ventured there yet. (I havenât. No one else in the fam will.) TBF told me about a her friend at school who has tens of thousands of followers on Instagram. This girl gets five thousand likes or views or hits (whatever itâs called on Instagram) on any given picture on any given day. (She doesnât use her real name, BTW.) Most of her photos are selfies.
What?
Selfies. Self portraits, of course. Iâve been enlightened.

My cartoon selfie
Sharpies
This ninth grader Instagram guru has very interesting hair. The Best Friend showed me one of her selfies. The brunette girlâs hair was pink. I mean pink. âIs that chalk?â I asked. After all, how are you going to get color to show up on brown hair like that?
Nope, not chalk. Sharpie.
What?
Hot pink Sharpie permanent marker. Evidently, itâs the latest way for teens to color their hair.
Who knew? I didnât. When I was in high school, we used different colored and metallic hair mousse. Sharpies were permanent markers and were mostly just black. (And I walked to school in a hurricane uphill both waysâthereâs not enough snow in Texas.)
I had so many questions. How permanent was it? Does the marker damage the hair? How do they get it out? What if they donât like the color? The Daughter said that they probably just use another color on top. (What does she know? Sheâs the Anti-Teenager.)
I should have texted The Best Friend and asked her. Instead, I tried it myself. I sacrificed a lock of hair and an old towel. My brown hair is darker than Instagram Girlâs, but you can see the color.

The things I’ll do for a picture…
Iâll be smelling that Sharpie marker all day now. Totes.
Do you have teenagers with strange, sheepish, or independent ways? Do you monitor your childâs social media use?
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