It’s Just a Light Snack!

I woke up to the sound of the toilet paper roll being spun. It was the middle of the night–no one was in the bathroom.  Everyone else was sleeping.

The toilet paper roll bumped the wall again.  And again.

I got up to investigate.  By the way, don’t ever do that in a horror movie. (You know what happens to the people who investigate the sound in horror movies.)

The bathroom was pitch black–the perfect place for a scary person or a demon to hide. (Everybody’s got to go, even demons, right?)

The noise continued.

When I turned on the light, this was the carnage:

Diana Beebe's Blog

…and the face that caused it:

It wasn't me. It was the demon dog...

It wasn’t me. It was the demon dog

Not a demon or slasher-movie villain! *wipes brow*

Hey, Eater of homework and valentines, the toilet paper is not hanging there so you can eat it like corn on the cob!

Another half of a toilet paper roll wasted. (Well, would you use paper that the dog slobbered on?)

Think about that for a second…

I didn’t think so.  😀 Now I have to take the rolls off before bed. Sigh.

What was the craziest thing one of your pets ate or did?  Any ideas for using the shredded toilet paper?

25 thoughts on “It’s Just a Light Snack!

  1. Nicole Grabner

    My dog, Rowdy, chases fairies in the morning. When the sun filters through our dining room window just right and catches on his collar, making a reflected light on the ground or wall, he chases them around the house. It’s the funniest thing to watch and it entertains him for hours! I would not have been brave enough to find out what the noise was in the middle of the night, that’s when I would have kicked my husband out of bed to investigate. One of the biproducts of being a writer is the great imagination that conjures up all kinds of creepy crawlies at night. 🙂

  2. Joy Dent

    My cats have always been the middle of the night culprits. When we lived in Kansas City, my husband would pheasant hunt. He brought home a beautiful pelt after one hunt and I salted it and prepared it for display. It sat beautifully on a stack of old books in our library. About that time we also got a new kitten and my older cat was not happy with the new addition.
    During the first night with the kitten, I was awakened by a creepy noise coming from the floor at the foot of my bead. When I sat up I could tell my older cat was chewing on something. I was horrified. I just knew my big cat was killing our new kitten. I was terrified to even turn on the light, but knew I had to.
    To my relief, big cat was chewing on the pheasant pelt. He had pretty much destroyed it. Heavy sigh! My new kitten was safe and my big kitty wasn’t a murderer! 🙂

    1. Diana Beebe Post author

      The first cat let you know in no uncertain terms the new cat wasn’t welcome. Eek! I’m glad she didn’t hurt the kitten. Did your husband ever get to save a pheasant pelt?

  3. Rebecca Enzor

    We used to have to close the bathroom door when we left so Boudin wouldn’t eat the toilet paper. We have metal covers over the rolls so the cats can’t get into them, but he’d just push the rolls off with his nose and then go to town. We’d come home to a TP mess in the bedroom.

    1. Diana Beebe Post author

      I’m very familiar with toilet paper carnage all over the floor. We tried putting the rolls on backwards, but it was just less mess. I’m glad to hear other dogs think it’s a treat, too.

  4. rcahill111

    Or just shut the bathroom door! lol

    I had a cat in the past that liked to lick grocery store bags and photos! You’d hear the sound of the bag moving gently in a rhythmic fashion and know what he was up to.

  5. Laura Ritchie

    Oh, what a brave soul you are! I’m sure I would have kicked DH to make him wake up and investigate.

    I have had so many weird animals, but the worst thing a dog ever ate was my Bible. I came home one day to find a chewed leather cover, and a layer of shredded paper all over the living room. Wow… was I ever upset. Funny now, but I’m pretty sure I sat down and cried over it at the time. Lol

    Great post, Diana! 🙂

    1. Diana Beebe Post author

      That leather cover must have smelled really yummy. I imagine that was a shock to see though. I’m so glad you stopped by, Laura!

  6. Andrew Toynbee

    I have a terrier that rushes to investigate any new shopping bags that arrive in the house. He isn’t after the food, but systematically removes and shreds every till (checkout) receipt he finds in the bags. Handy for credit card security, but a nightmare when goods have to be returned! He also chases fairies…any reflections on the wall get whimpered or wagged at. When he was little he chewed through every one of our laptop charger cables – always the low voltage end, fortunately!

    1. Diana Beebe Post author

      Your terrier is hilarious. I guess you have to hide the receipts for things you might want to return. I wonder what drives our pets to such quirkiness. So glad his electrical habit didn’t hurt him! Thanks for stopping by.

  7. Melinda VanLone

    We had a cat that liked to chew electric cords. Thankfully he never shocked himself, but we have all kind of cords with teeth marks now. My other cat watches TV and chases shadows on the wall. So far, though, he’s left the toilet paper alone. Thank goodness!

    1. Diana Beebe Post author

      What is it about electricity that makes pets want to eat power cords? You just reminded me of the illegal pet rabbit one of my college roommates had. That thing chewed on everthing, including my iron cord (which I still use!). I did put electrical tape on it. I’m going to have to tell that story… 🙂

  8. julipagemorgan

    I once had a cat whose hobby was unrolling all the paper from the roll during the night. If I forgot to close the bathroom door before bed I’d wake up to the sound of the roll rattling against the spindle. Now I always keep the door closed, so my current cats don’t even realize there’s a roll just waiting to be unwound. My dog wouldn’t do it, anyway – she’s scared of toilet paper. She’s also scared of plastic bags, the television remote and her newest squeaky toy. I feel so protected when I’m home alone! LOL!

    1. Diana Beebe Post author

      The greatest toilet paper mess ever is one like your cat loves to create. Your other cats don’t know what they are missing. 😉
      My dog leaves streamers and pieces, but he hasn’t unrolled an entire one yet.

  9. Kassandra Lamb

    I refuse to tell you what my current dog’s favorite snack is becaue it will totally gross you out. Suffice it to say that it makes her sick. But she’s too dumb to make the connection.

    I had another dog years ago who ate all kinds of strange things that weren’t supposed to be edible. They never seemed to bother her though,
    went straight through her system. The funniest item was the shredded orange balloon we found in her poop a couple days after we gave out balloons to all the kids at our son’s birthday party. I called around to all the mothers to make sure she hadn’t eaten the kid attached to the balloon as well. Everyone was fine.

    1. Diana Beebe Post author

      I’ll trust your silence on the dog’s gross snack, but my imagination has gone wild with it.

      LOL. I’m so glad none of the birthday guests were eaten. Thanks for the blog love!

  10. Tara

    That’s great! My cat does the same thing – and I take the roll off too! but because cats are so nimble, I can’t just set it on the back of the toilet. No. I have to hide it! Somewhere near the toilet, of course. So when friends come over and go into the barroom, they have to look for the toilet paper roll, wondering, “Hmm, if I were a roll of TP, where would I hide?”

    1. Diana Beebe Post author

      So your cat says, “What the mouse?!” everytime he goes into the bathroom to play with the roll and can’t find it. (Sorry, couldn’t resist!). And the mystery of Tara’s missing tp has been solved. 😀

  11. Debra Kristi

    We currently have a cat that will eat anything. Seriously. Carpet fiber, Legos, loose change. It’s all game. It’s a real pain in the . 😀 She’s costing us a bloody fortune! Good luck teaching your little pup. I think mine is beyond that.

    1. Diana Beebe Post author

      Oh, gross–I’ve never heard about a cat eating everything like that! I feel for you!

      There’s no teaching our pup either. He’s 12 years old now and rather set in his ways. I spent A LOT of time training him when he was a pup, because he loved to counter surf. Also, as a puppy, he would get mad at his “sister” (Mockingbird), and chew up her toys. I haven’t figured out how to train him to leave the toilet paper alone.

  12. lynnkelleyauthor

    This is so funny, Diana! One of our dogs used to love to raid the cat’s litter box for treats. Pretty disgusting, huh?

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